Signs you've been watching too much Stargate
by Clara, Karaden and Charon
It’s quite worrying just how many of these at least one of us has done/contemplated. We wrote this on the last day of the JCUKjnr February meet up when we were supposed to be getting ready to head to the train station for Rel and Becs train. What can I say? Procrastination is fun!!
***
You start to see the possibilities of a Hammond/Frasier relationship.
You shout ‘Jaffa Kree’ every time you see a tube of jaffa cakes.
You decide for Halloween you’re going to make a Hathor outfit out of tin foil, a bikini and a sarong.
You re watch Ascension despite the bad story line, just to see what they use to make the mini stargate so you can attempt to build one.
Every time you have an argument with someone you wish you had a hand device or zat gun handy.
You start writing down every bit of Goa’uld you hear so that you can compile your own dictionary.
You attempt to learn Hieroglyphics on the off chance that you might one day meet Daniel Jackson.
You consider moving to America just to you can join USAF and get involved with the Stargate program.
You construct your own staff weapon out of toilet roll tubes and a light bulb.
You memorise all your favourite characters catch phases and use them as much as possible during the day.
You start to play ‘spot the director’ in every episode directed by Martin Wood.
You start watching MacGyver just so you can marvel that MacGyver will one day become Jack O’Neill.
You wonder if blowing purple glitter in guys’ faces would get the same effect as Hathor.
You start your own Thor fan club.
You attempt to break into the Cheyenne mountain complex, and are disappointed when your purple glitter does not impress the guards.
You start calling your best friend space monkey for no apparent reason.
Your hard drive is full of Slash fic and J/D music videos.
You find yourself singing along to the theme tune, at first every week and then everyday when you finally d/l it.
You start to write fanfic at every given opportunity.
You giggle at the fact that ‘MacGyver’ is a word in windows XP dictionary.
You take your lap top into Starbucks and come up with ways in which you watch too much stargate.
You Sit in front of a mirror and attempt Teal’c’s raised eyebrow.
You sit on front of the mirror and practise Jacks ‘wounded puppy dog’ look
You start analysing where the characters are standing in relation to their relationship with one another. (In both canon and fanfiction)
You can tell which series you’re watching depending on Jacks/Sams/Janets/Daniels (Teal’c) hair.
You pause your video/DVD just to stare at Daniel/Jack/Sam/Janet/Hammond or Teal’c.
You watch Stargate episodes in Starbucks even though you can’t hear the sound.
You compare every guy you meet to Jack, Daniel or Teal’c.
The signature on your text messages/e-mails consists of three words: ahh Jack *thud*
You can tell what scene an episode is from, after only seeing 2 seconds of it with no sound.
You sit in your music class and figure out who all the members of the class are most like.
You see the resemblance between your ex history teacher and Anise.
You start to have dreams revolving around your friends having relationships with Stargate characters.
You take every Stargate quiz you can get your hands on and then proudly display the score in you Live Journal.
The very thought that Sam and Jack might not get together makes you ridiculously depressed.
Your parents get fed up of you collecting toilet rolls to make your staff weapon with so offer to by you a curtain rail.
You build a mock stargate and DHD in your room.
You build your own Replicator army out of lego or mechano.
You start to wonder how General Hammond fixed the hole in his wall after Upgrades.
You phone your friends and discuss which Goa’uld you’re all most like.