Birthday Surprise

By Amanda Hawthorn

RATING: PG-13

PAIRING: Grissom/Sara    

CATEGORY: Angst/ romance

ARCHIVE: Grissomandsara.com and my site http://www.pink-martini.net/amanda/

FEEDBACK: Love it, but no flames please I’m fragile!!

EMAIL:  [email protected]

SPOILERS: Loosely based on season 4

SUMMARY: Sara has the blues. Can Grissom help her smile?

DISCLAIMER: CSI belongs to CBS and Alliance-Atlantis Productions. No
infringement intended.
AUTHORS’ NOTES: This is for Laura Katharine who not only is a great friend, but also had her birthday yesterday. Happy Birthday hun, this is for you….. 

Silence echoed around the break room after all of the night shift filed out one by one, leaving Sara sitting alone in her chair. No one had remembered that today was her birthday. A twinge of hurt crashed throughout her heart, leaving her aching with the loneliness that had seemed to surround her since Grissom’s rejection of her only a few months prior.

She should have expected this really, after all she was still the outsider on the team, and when push came to shove, was the one no one fully trusted. Sighing heavily, she stood up and pushed her chair back behind her. It was a little after 7.30 A.M. Shift was over and it was time for her to go home.

Gathering up her papers, she turned to walk slowly towards the door, her heart lying heavy inside her chest. It shouldn’t have been a big deal; after all it’s only a stupid birthday, the supposed celebration of another added year of age, knowledge and experience. Swallowing down the hurt, she made her way towards the locker room. A hot bath and then maybe a glass of wine were waiting for her when she got home; her own private party. She had expected the others to still be lingering in the small room when she arrived, but it was empty. Ignoring the aching emptiness, she pulled her jacket and bag out of her locker and walked slowly out of the door. “Get over it Sidle,” she chided herself softly, “no one gives a damn.”

On her way out of the building she nodded to the familiar faces of the day shift, their empty smiles leaving her feeling more alone than before. What was with her lately anyway? When had she become so sad? A man’s face sprang to her mind, bringing the intense heartache and longing along with him. She knew he was the cause, and she knew her love for him was unrequited, but it didn’t stop her heart from pouring over with love whenever he deemed her worthy of a smile, which was a rarity these days.

Grissom looked up when she passed his office. He’d noticed how quiet she had been of late, even the others had started to comment on her withdrawal. He had expected her to stop and at least say goodbye, just like she’d always done in the past, but today, she seemed more distant than before.

“Sara..” he called out before his brain had a chance to register what he was doing. How did she always do this to him? She reduced him to someone incapable of speech whenever he tried to form coherent sentences. When she didn’t stop walking, he got up from his chair and moved towards the door to poke his head through into the corridor. “Sara,” he called again.

Sara stopped dead in her tracks and for a second was torn between turning around to face him or pretend she hadn’t heard him and make good her escape. Turning around slowly, she stood as still as she possibly could, unwilling to reveal to him how empty she actually felt right now.

Her eyes seemed to haunt him, and in that one moment Grissom actually saw the sadness in her eyes. Coming out into the corridor, he tried to keep his voice level as he neared her. “Are you heading home?”

“Yeah,” she told him simply, remembering her rambling of a week ago when she’d asked him to pin her up against the blood stained sheet. She had made a silent promise to herself that she would keep things strictly professional, only speak when spoken to. So why wasn’t her heart listening to her? “Do you need me to work?”

“No,” he told her quickly, stunned that he hadn’t received one of her smiles that always weakened his knees. “Um, have you got a minute?”

“Is it about work?” she asked quietly, part of her hoping that he would say yes.

“No, I just need to speak to you,” standing beside his office door, he motioned her to step inside. He could see her reluctance and for a heartbreaking moment he thought she would turn and flee, but she didn’t. When she slowly started to walk back towards him, relief flooded his chest.

Sara’s mind was reeling, what had she done wrong this time? She hadn’t spoken out of turn had she? She hadn’t spoken to him like she used to in over a week, so what had she done to deserve a private talk in his office? Her mind was screaming at her as she slowly stepped between him and the door, careful not to look him in the eye or brush against him in any way.

She heard the door close behind her, flinching slightly as it snapped shut. Hugging her jacket closer to her stomach, she waited silently for the talk that would no doubt be following this little heart to heart of his.

“You can sit down Sara,” he told her quietly when he realized she hadn’t moved from the center of the room.

Sara could feel the sting of tears gathering in her eyes and blinked them away frantically. What was she doing? This was all so wrong. Swallowing hard she moved over to a chair opposite his desk and sat down silently.

Grissom was starting to become worried when she sat there silently waiting. She looked like someone who was waiting for their own execution, her eyes looking around the room; looking at his cluttered desk, watching the tarantula slowly crawling inside of the terrarium, looking anywhere but at him. Against his better judgment, he pulled a chair around to sit next to her, feeling her stiffen beside him.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered softly, clutching her jacket tighter as if it provided some protection against whatever he was going to berate her for this time.

“Huh?” he asked, “What are you sorry for?”

“I don’t know,” she sighed sadly, closing her eyes, “whatever it is I’ve done this time.”

“Sara?” he whispered, his own heart aching under the intense pressure of her sadness. “Sara, please look at me?”

She shook her head venomously, “I can’t.”

“Sara,” he shuffled a little closer to her so he was almost touching her. “Please?”

“It’ll just make it worse if I look at you,” she whispered as a single tear trickled down her face. Lifting her hand, she moved to brush it away but Grissom’s fingers had already reached her face, tilting her chin.

“Please don’t cry,” he whispered, his voice softer than she had ever heard it before. “I’m sorry I’ve been such an ass to you. None of this is your fault.”

“It is,” she blurted, more tears cascading from her eyes, wetting his fingers that held her face so tenderly. “This is all my fault. I shouldn’t have said anything. I’m so sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry Sara,” he told her softly as he brushed her cheek gently. “I should have done something about this a long time ago.”

“You want me to leave don’t you?” The raw pain in her heart rose up through her eyes and she found herself drawn to him. “Just say it and then this will all be over. Please Grissom, just tell me you want me gone and so I can get over you.”

Her pain brought an onslaught of emotions to his heart, causing him to reach for her and pull her into his arms. He wrapped her in his embrace, his arms providing a fierce protection from everything that had caused her pain, including himself. “I don’t want you to go,” he whispered, “Please don’t leave me.”

His words brought more tears to her eyes and she collapsed against him, clinging to him desperately as they both released the emotions that had controlled them for so long. Grissom turned his head slightly and began planting kisses in her hair, his touch willing her to understand just how much he adored her. Sara tried to control her breathing. This man had always held her heart, and she had just about given up on ever being this close to him. His touch enticed feelings in her that she had buried so deep that no one had ever been able to access them, but here she was now, in the arms of the man she had loved for almost a third of her life.

Grissom started to pull away slowly, untangling his hands from around her body to gaze down into her flushed face. Her eyes were closed, but her tears still leaked out from the corner of her closed lids. Gliding his fingers up to her face, he stroked her cheeks gently, willing her to open her eyes for him. He leaned closer towards her, his breath warm against her face and for a brief moment she opened her eyes to see him dangerously close to her lips, but still, she couldn’t pull away from him.

“I want to kiss you,” he whispered softly, his eyes silently asking permission before he let his lips touch hers. She raised her lips to his, granting him the heavenly release that they both desperately sought. The second their lips touched, both of them felt the jolt of electricity burst through their bodies. Sara could feel him, the real Gil Grissom, unleashing his deep passion into their kiss and she suddenly felt the final crack in the wall around her heart give way to tumble down around her. Opening her mouth against his, she ran her tongue across his lips begging for entry, which he readily granted. Tongues met, brushing together as their hands adored each other with trembling fingers. Sitting further back in his chair, Grissom pulled her towards him, hoping she would follow. Sara’s jacket fell to the floor as she maneuvered closer to him, their lips still joined. Letting him be her guide, she willingly followed him, his hands telling her where he wanted her to be. She straddled his thighs, sighing contently against his lips when he reached up behind her to pull her closer into his body. They sank closer together, both of them giving in to the magnetic pull that had been drawing them nearer for years.

Pulling away from him abruptly, Sara gazed down into his eyes gasping for breath. “Griss,” she whispered with a smile while she held her forehead to his own. “We’re still at work.”

“Come home with me?” he whispered hoarsely as his hands slid from behind her back to glide possessively over her breasts, lingering for a moment and then returned to face to tangle in her hair. Kissing him again, Sara lost herself in his touch, mumbling something that got caught somewhere between the passionate haze surrounding her brain.

“Yes,” she whimpered softly when he began to trace his lips down her neck. How could this be happening? Pulling away from him abruptly, she closed her eyes briefly only to open them again. “You’re still here,” she whispered.

“I’m still here,” he mumbled, chuckling softly as he brought her head down again to kiss her lips softly.

“I’m dreaming,” she sighed when he trailed kisses over her face, “this is just some fantasy conjured up inside my brain and I’ll wake up and be alone again.”

“No dream honey,” he told her his voice dipping in desire as he brought his lips to her eyes, kissing each eye in turn.

“You’re real?” she whispered, still unwilling to believe he was actually here.

“I’m real,” he smiled. Lifting her off his lap, he held onto her hand and pulled her with him around his desk while he opened a drawer. “I was going to give this to you this afternoon at dinner.”

“Dinner?” she asked softly as she released his hand to take the offered envelope from his. “What’s this?”

“Open it and see,” he smiled, bringing one of her hands up to his lips to place a soft kiss on her fingers.

Sara smiled at him while she pulled open the envelope, her eyes falling to the card that she held in her hands. “Oh Griss,” she whimpered, “you remembered?”

“How could I forget your birthday?” Coming around to stand behind her, he drew her into his arms, embracing her from behind. “So will you?”

“Will I what?” she asked softly while she opened the card and read his unique writing and finally understood. Turning in his arms, she smiled up at him before meeting his lips again with her own.

“I take it that’s a yes?” he smiled against her lips.

“Yes,” she grinned, kissing him soundly, “I will have dinner with you.” Moving her hands up his chest she linked her fingers behind his neck and kissed his chin, “Yes I still have feelings for you.” Trailing soft kisses from his chin up to his mouth, she pressed her lips to his one last time before drawing away. “Yes I’ll go home with you.”

Grissom could feel his heart bursting with love and found it increasingly difficult to draw away from her. Reaching for her hand, he clutched her fingers between his. “Let’s get out of here…”

Bending to retrieve her jacket in her free hand, she released his hand and picked up the card with the other. “I’m ready.”

They shared one last secret smile before he opened the door and ushered her outside into the corridor. Walking side by side, they moved towards the exit, bumping shoulders as they walked. Sara glanced up into his eyes as they reached the cool morning air and was met with his smoldering smile. Life was pretty good, she mused as they walked over towards his Tahoe and started their first day together…

THE END……….. Happy Birthday Laura Katharine  : D