Low
By Clara
Summary: He doesn�t want me.
Disclaimer: They�re not mine
Rating: PG
Category: C/G, S/G, S/N, C/W friendship
Authors notes: Another one of those real life inspired fics.
Dedication: Thanks to Angie for the beta.
***
There�s this feeling of helplessness mixed with heartache as I watch them
together.
I can�t remember who�s idea it was for the shift to go out together on our off
night, but I wish to god I�d made up some excuse about being busy. Then I
wouldn�t have had to put myself through this torture.
They�ve been talking between themselves for a good hour now. Heads bent close
together and the occasional chuckle floats over� I�d say I feel like a third
wheel but Warrick, Greg and Nick are here too, so the analogy falls flat.
Nick is looking almost as upset as I�m feeling� I wonder if he feels as big a
fool.
I don�t know how I didn�t see this coming. It all seems so obvious now; all the
little smiles and laughs I�ve seen them share. I�d always interpreted it as
being a student and teacher relationship� I couldn�t have been more wrong.
I don�t doubt that he never meant to hurt me. He�s just not that sort of person.
He�s probably not even aware of how I feel, although I�m guessing from the looks
Warrick and Greg are shooting me, it�s obvious to everyone else.
�Catherine?�
I attempt to smile at Warrick as he leans across the table towards me. �Want to
dance?�
I almost say no, but then I catch sight of the happy couple again and I don�t
think I can go back to staring at them. So I nod, smile and let him take my hand
and lead me towards the dance floor.
�How you doing, Cath?� He asks as his arms wrap around me and I bury my head in
his shoulder. There�s a possibility that the 3 screwdrivers are beginning to
have an effect on me.
�I�m� hurt.� Warrick seems to bring the truth out of me. I don�t think I�ve ever
been able to lie or hold back when he�s around. I feel rather than see him sigh
and I chock back tears. �He doesn�t want me Warrick.�
He hugs me tighter and stays silent. He knows better than to try and deny what�s
going on back at our table. I�m almost afraid to turn around in case things have
moved up a notch.
I sigh and try to get my feelings under control. Whatever happens I�m going to
have to work with them, I can�t go through this every time I see them together,
it�ll destroy me if I do.
Warrick pulls back and studies my face, I breathe out and shrug as I answer his
silent question. �I�ll be okay�. I have to be.�
He smiles and kisses me on the forehead before leading me back to the table.
It�s times like this when I wish I�d fallen for him instead of Gil. Everything
would have been so much easier.
Back at the table Sara is now having a lively discussion with Greg while Gil and
Nick look on, I try not to read anything into the slight smile on Gil�s face as
he watches her. His eyes turn to me as Warrick and I rejoin the table.
�Everything alright?�
�It will be.� He looks puzzled before smiling at me, despite having no real idea
of what�s just happened. But it really will be okay� It has to be.